


Baby Makes Three

by MagpieMorality



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Family Bonding, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff, Kid Virgil, M/M, New Parents Intruality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-04
Updated: 2020-06-09
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:26:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 5,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22993918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagpieMorality/pseuds/MagpieMorality
Summary: In which Remus and Patton navigate the joys and surprises of parenthood with baby Virgil.
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 65
Kudos: 338





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From this prompt:
> 
> Hey I have an absolutely golden idea- more intruality parents. 
> 
> This is a prequel to chapter 2, written out of order!

“The baby is _what_?!” Patton shrieked in the other room. Remus sat bolt upright, vaulting over the back of the couch and scrambling over to Patton, vibrating next to him as he waited for Patton to get off the phone and explain. 

With wide eyes and a pale face, Patton turned to him. His mouth moved but no sound came out, until he gasped, dropping the phone entirely and grabbing Remus’s face in his hands. 

“What? What is it?!” Remus urged, clutching at his waist nervously. “Is the baby okay? Are they- is there a problem? Did she change her mind?!” 

“N- no sugar...” Patton wheezed. “The baby is coming. _The baby is coming_!” 

They stood and stared at each other, hearts pounding in time, the air hanging still around them in anticipation, and then they jumped back to reality. “The baby is coming!” Remus yelled, picking Patton up and spinning him around. “Oh _shit_ , the baby’s coming... We gotta _go_ babe, c’mon, hup to!” 

“Grab the bag!” 

“I got the bag, grab your phone! Oh and charger!” 

“Don’t forget snacks!”

Remus stuck his head out of the bedroom with a raised eyebrow. “Why do we need snacks?” Patton threw his hands up, looking a damn sight more frazzled than two minutes ago. 

“I don’t know, just bring some! And your wallet, we need to get flowers!” 

“Do you have the blanket too?”

“Remus of course I have the blanket just- is that it? Are we, are we actually ready to go?” 

They met in the middle of their living room, sharing a breathless laugh of pure excitement. “I think we’re ready, Pats,” Remus murmured, clutching the go-bag with white knuckles. “Let’s go bring baby home. But you drive, I’m too fu- uh fudging wired to drive right now.”

“Good save,” Patton laughed, grabbing his keys off the counter on the way past. “Let’s go become parents.”


	2. Chapter 2

Patton loved their new son. Virgil, he was called, a parting gift from his mother, and a name that both fathers had agreed they liked. Unique without being too out there, and creative and interesting, just like Patton already knew their baby was. In fact it would actually be more accurate to say that Patton adored their new son because he couldn’t take his eyes off the boy and he had developed a tendency to burst into tears at the littlest things the baby did.

But if Patton adored his son then Remus had hit a whole other level of love. He insisted on being the one to get up night after night; checking and double checking the warmth of the formula; carrying him everywhere he went. Patton was honestly a little jealous, though who of he couldn’t say. Remus even _sang_ to Virgil, and he steadfastly refused to do so for Patton, except when very, very drunk. 

“Sometimes I think you love that baby more than me,” Patton joked one day and Remus frowned, looking up from the baby fast asleep in his lap, his hands and legs curled up to his chest, head resting on Remus’s carefully held together knees. 

“That’s not something you should compare,” he’d replied. “I love you both, but he’s... he’s just so perfect, babe, I can’t look away-” his voice held a reverent, breathless quality and he’d barely looked up before he was looking down again. “I don’t want to miss anything he does.”

Patton sat down beside his partner and hugged him, kissing Remus’s shoulder and resting his chin there. “I know, I’m only teasing. But you can trust me to look after him too, you know? We’re both his parents now. Why don’t I get up tonight, let you sleep a bit, hm honey?” 

Remus blinked at the baby, running a finger lightly down his nose to watch how it wrinkled, and he yawned in response. They both smiled at the cute picture. “But what if he cries? He likes to be rocked like, this one exact way that, well it’s easier on my shoulders and, you know I’m just used to him now so what if-” 

“We will be absolutely fine, sweetheart, I promise,” Patton murmured, kissing his cheek, before turning Remus’s face to kiss him properly. “I want to learn all those things too. And you need some rest, Reem, you’re exhausted. I don’t know how much you’ve slept since we got him, but it’s been nearly three weeks already and I’m pretty sure you’ve been up every single night so far. Give yourself a break, okay?”

“But I-” Patton’s finger pressed to his lips and stopped him, but his thumb brushed away the wrinkles on Remus’s forehead when the other father frowned in worry. 

“No buts. You sleep tonight; I will spend some quality with little mister here. Please?” 

Remus had never yet been able to resist giving Patton anything he asked for, so it wasn’t a surprise when he sighed and agreed. 

Getting him to go back to sleep and let Patton handle Virgil later that night was a little more difficult, but when Remus woke feeling more well-rested and calmer than he had since Virgil had come into their lives he had to admit that maybe Patton had a point, and from that point on they shared their fatherly duties a little more evenly. 

They still competed over who got to hold him most though, and Remus won often enough to make him incredibly smug. Patton kinda liked that look on him though, while he was holding their son, so it wasn’t much of a hardship. 


	3. Chapter 3

“This _can’t_ be normal!” Patton wailed, holding his son up out from his chest as the little boy made chirping, meeping noises, grinning at him. “Virgil, baby! You are so cute, _so cute_! Why are you so cute?! _Remus_!” 

“Yeah babe,” Remus leaned over the back of the couch to see what was going on in the kitchenette, blinking at the sight patiently. “What’s the matter?” 

Patton pouted and cuddled Virgil close, that pout getting more and more pronounced as Virgil kept on _miaowing and petting at his shoulder_. “Oh, right,” Remus said, eyeing the two of them. “Do you need hugs? You look like you need hugs. C’mere, bring small fry with you.” That was all the invitation Patton needed before he was sniffling into Remus’s shoulder and stroking Virgil’s downy head. 

“He’s just _perfect_ I can’t!” Patton mumbled, watching Virgil unsteadily sit himself up on Remus’s lap and make the miaowing noise again. It nearly sent the young father into real sobs, but Remus managed to distract daddy and baby with a few silly faces, gasping dramatically and cooing over Virgil’s new noise. 

“Did you make a miaow?! Did you?! You did! Wow!” He said, his usually booming voice tempered for little ears, supporting the tiny human with a careful hand behind his back. On it’s own that affectionate scene would have been enough to make the ever-emotional Patton weepy, but paired with the way Virgil lifted a hand, fascinated with Remus’s moustache and accidentally booping his dad’s nose in the process; it was game over. 

Remus tried not to laugh too obviously as he soothed his lapful of joyfully sobbing partner, winking at Virgil when the boy looked at him with wide eyes. “Daddy’s a little overwhelmed right now small fry, so we’re gonna let him get it all out and then see if we can get some of these noises on video for when you’re all big and embarrassed.”

Virgil just tilted his head and beamed with another chirping miaow, setting Patton into a fresh wave of muffled tears. 

They did manage to get it on video in the end, complete with Patton’s unshakeable smile and happy, hiccuping crying as he cuddled the baby tenderly. It made him cry anew every single time they watched it for the rest of their lives (too often for Virgil’s taste really) until it was eventually shown at the now-grown start of the video’s wedding. And then? It was Remus’s turn for waterworks. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From this prompt:
> 
> May we see Virgil's first steps, please?

Virgil's first steps technically happened twice. 

It _actually_ happened when Remus was out getting groceries, in the end. Patton had been laying on the floor propped half up against the couch and yawning as he watched some paw patrol with Virgil, when the boy had decided he wanted to be over with his papa instead of sitting on the baby mat. 

Patton never saw it coming. Virgil crawled over to him, reaching his knee easily in his speedy shuffle, and then he put his little chubby hands on Patton’s leg and hoisted himself upright. Not unusual in itself; he’d been doing that for a week or so, but then he _took a step towards Patton’s face._

Dead silence fell as Patton resisted the urge to scream in pride and joy, just sitting utterly still with his eyes impossibly wide as his baby tested a step or two, using his leg for balance and then flopped onto his lap with a giggle. 

“Oh. My. _Gosh_!” Patton crowed then, scooping Virgil up under his arms and standing him on his thighs to grin at the delighted child. “You’re amazing! You did it! Those feet are going! And daddy-” he gasped in horror. “Daddy wasn’t here! Oh _no_!” 

What could he do?! He hadn’t filmed it! He hadn’t known it was even coming! Remus was going to be back in a few minutes and he was going to be _heartbroken_ \- 

Unless. 

“Say V, what do you think we just... don’t tell daddy about this, hm? Keep it between you and me? That’s okay right, a little white lie so he doesn’t refuse to ever leave the house again until you’re a grumpy teenager?” Virgil bounced in his gentle grip, babbling his slowly forming childish babble. Patton took that to be a yes, and hugged him, turning him around so Virgil could get comfy and finish watching the episode. 

Remus would forever think it first happened that same evening, when he was dancing around in the kitchen getting ready to cook, and looked down to see Virgil holding his leg and slowly using it to pull himself up, like he was slowly falling into the habit of doing. 

His soft shout drew Patton in to see what the fuss was about, only to find Remus on the floor, hugging Virgil and very near to tears. With the fondest, softest expression on his already often-sappy face, Remus explained that their son had taken his first steps, and Patton played along perfectly by bursting into tears and joining them on the floor (after turning the hob down low, for safety). 

It was only partially put on, because who wouldn’t cry when their partner and baby were so cute together, and when Remus was looking like he’d been gifted the entire world? 

Every new milestone was just blessing after blessing. He had the best little family _ever_. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From this prompt:
> 
> When my siblings and I were babies, my dad had us try sauerkraut. None of us liked it at all, because it is bitter. And that seems like something daddy Remus would do?

Babies were awesome. Remus was of the opinion that there was basically nothing better in the entire world. He went to sleep at night dreaming of Virgil’s little smile, his laugh, the way he peered over Patton’s shoulder when he carried the kid around the apartment. He loved Virgil more than he loved just about anything in life, and he got an unholy amount of joy from watching his kid learn about the world bit by bit. 

Case in point; when Virgil started eating solids. 

They shared cooking duties mostly, because Remus liked to experiment with food and sometimes Patton needed a break and something a bit more plain. Virgil was a whole new testing ground for them, trying to find things he liked and keep him well fed and healthy, but Remus had some extra fun with mealtimes as well. 

“You love my food, don’t you kiddo?” He murmured, sitting at the little round kitchen table and leaning his cheek on his hand, watching as Virgil picked over the peas littering his highchair tray, lifting them to his mouth one by one and giggling whenever one fell from his little fingers onto the floor for Remus to dutifully pick up and throw away. “You wanna try something new today huh? Maybe something a little more fun? We got lemons, or maybe some chilli- can babies have chilli? Patton would say no so we’ll save that for the future. How about lemons, kiddo? Maybe you’ll turn out like your daddy. I’ve got some strong tastes.”

Virgil babbled, bashing his hands on the tray table. Good enough. 

Remus grinned at him, fetching a lemon and cutting a small sliver for Virgil and a wedge for himself to suck on. He held the small piece out, letting Virgil sniff it and then, wonderfully, stick his tongue out to taste the offering. 

Oh the look on his little face! He first just blinked, and then made a terrible shouting howl and scrunched up his face. To Remus’s dismay he started to cry, settling for the usual option to express his gross displeasure. “Hey, hey now, it’s alright!” Remus cooed, picking the little guy up and wiping his cheeks. “We’ll leave that for now then, how about that?” He smiled at the pout he was given, smacking a kiss to Virgil’s forehead and letting him down onto the floor so he could clean the remains of lunch up. 

He cut another slice of lemon for himself though. Virgil would understand one day, if he had anything to say about it!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From this prompt:
> 
> Baby makes three, bby Virgil making a mess? Whether that's by splattering food all over the kitchen, or finding a big mud puddle, or something else.

After Virgil started walking life got a whole lot crazier and a whole lot more _fun_. His exhausted but adoring fathers would find him racing around the apartment, dancing on the couch or most often- trying to climb something he shouldn’t. He hated shoes (which Remus personally agreed with) and he loved to be up and out of his crib, managing even to climb over the side (they started leaving it down after that, just in case). 

The little bundle of chaos never seemed to hurt himself despite the speed with which he zoomed around, experiencing the world, and had fully got on board with Patton’s joy for life and the world around him, delighting in every new thing he could touch and explore. 

One day, in search of something to occupy Virgil and a reason to leave the apartment on a rare joint day off; Patton suggested they take Virgil to the park to feed the ducks. It was a tiny little place, but well kept enough to be safe for children, and Virgil had enjoyed going outside very much up until then. 

It was great! Except that it backfired slightly, because Virgil started to whine whenever he woke up, trying to sneak out of the front door whenever anyone went in and out. The first time he’d got halfway down the third floor corridor before Remus had bolted after him, white in the face and laughing with relief at the timely response. 

“We gotta get him a nanny or something babe, I swear,” Remus groaned, throwing the shrieking baby over his shoulder after round three of the Great Escape that morning. He slurped at his coffee with the other hand, until Virgil kicked it and enough fell on Remus’s shirt to make him pout. “He’s obsessed!”

“Or,” Patton countered, pushing his tablet across the kitchen table with the same grin that usually meant Remus was about to be sweetly and mercilessly convinced to do or get something for his partner. “We could look at moving?”

“Ah jeez Pat, you know we can’t afford that!” 

“Well not round _here_ , but we could go somewhere further out, a bit quieter. I’ve been talking to my colleagues and Valerie says it’s not that hard to find work in the suburbs! Or... we go even further and make a real change. Somewhere cheap and cheerful.”

Remus wrinkled his nose. “Away from your family? Our friends?” 

“For Virgil. We could get somewhere with a garden, Remus!” 

Patton’s wide blue eyes blinked at him hopefully and Remus felt himself already starting to crack. “Look, we can think about it. Talk about it, whatever. But maybe it would be better to start looking at a ground floor apartment in a building, somewhere with a garden, if you’re so keen. Further out of the city, sure.”

“I knew you’d come round,” Patton smiled, kissing Remus’s rough cheek as he came to relieve him of the irate child. 

* * *

When Fall came round the rain started up again for the year, bringing grey clouds and the sad reality that summer park visits were over. Virgil was as displeased as ever, to be barred from his favourite place, and even with the chair they’d set up so he could stand and look out of the window, sucking on a pacifier, it wasn’t enough. 

The housing discussion was still going on, but the deciding factor came one day when Patton brought home the newest outfit for Virgil. It consisted of a matching purple rain hat and coat, and some bright red wellies for the rain, adorably small and guaranteed to melt any onlooker’s heart. 

It was genius on his part, not just because Virgil’s first experience with rain was getting to stomp around in puddles, shrieking with glee as Remus danced around with him in the park the next afternoon, sticking his tongue out to copy his daddy when carefully shown how. The mud puddles seemed to bring the greatest joy, splashing the dirty water around with a great roar of triumph that made Remus cackle and Patton subtly wipe- _the rain, Remus, it’s the rain_ \- water out of his face. 

But the other unexpectedly wonderful side benefit of the whole glorious outing was that when they turned to walk back, Virgil waddling ahead and thoroughly dirtying up his nice new clothes (”That’s my boy,” Remus said, about a million times); Remus threw an arm around Patton’s shoulders and hauled him in for a big hug. And as he did, he declared, “We’re going house shopping, Pat! Get your gel pens ready! Get this boy a _garden_."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From this prompt:
> 
> Hmmmm... baby Virgil continues to own my heart, so... Raspberries? Your choice on which kind.

Raspberries were Remus's favourite. The fruit that was; he adored the sweetness and the muskiness of them compared to their more popular counterpart, the strawberry. They were soft and sort of hairy, and if you got to pick them fresh you had to steal them from the spiky clutches of the thorned bush they grew on. Raspberries were great.

He'd moved on from trying Virgil with weird and wonderful flavours (not entirely by choice; Patton had come home at the wrong moment and had seen the bottle of sriracha and Remus comforting a howling Virgil and had Put His Foot Down) and was satisfying his urge to see Virgil's eyes light up and amazing new things to put in his mouth with more normal edible items.

Fruit was on the list this week, and with late summer in full force the raspberries in the farmers' market (that he totally went to with Patton and Virgil like a true millenial parent) were big and juicy and perfect.

As they wandered down and Patton cooed over jars of artisan honey or handmade soap Remus handed Virgil, sitting on his shoulders, raspberry after raspberry. The kid seemed to love them too, which was awesome. He reached for them every time with covetous fingers, tugging on Remus's hair when he wasn't obliged fast enough, and doing his baby-best to get the little berry to his mouth each time. Some of them were lost to the ground with a soft sound of dismay, but mostly Remus was proud to say 'eating small things alone' was really coming along.

Raspberries. Patton _loved_ raspberries. Not the fruit kind, but the kind you could blow onto a squirming little tummy to elicit the most beautiful peals of childish laughter you ever heard. Virgil's noises were the best of course, but Remus came a close second because the sound of his big, bright laugh and pure joy always made Patton fall in love with him all over again.

He'd get him on their lazy mornings sometimes, pretending to go to press a soft kiss to his bare shoulder and instead blowing the raspberry against his warm skin, and Remus would usually retaliate with tickles or deep, sweet kisses. Sometimes it was while they were lying on the couch, and while Patton was cuddled up to his partner he felt the tempting tug of mischief. He'd pull Remus's shirt up and put his lips to his belly before the man could protest and make him break into startled glee.

When Virgil came along Patton was a little teary when he discovered their reactions were so similar. Like father like son, he would sniff, before going back to his delightful task. Virgil loved it, demanding more as often as he could.

Once they were done in the market and had chosen a picnic spot in the park nearby, Patton felt the same urge come over him and he rolled up over onto his side to see where Remus and Virgil were sat next to him chatting away to each other. Remus was responding to every little babbling noise as though it were a scandalous piece of gossip, and Virgil seemed entirely serious about the things he was trying to communicate.

As Remus plucked another raspberry from the punnet, Patton swooped in, plucking Virgil from his father's arms and holding him high in the air with a grin. Virgil laughed and kicked his feet, and then let out that delightful sound as Patton brought him close to blow a few noisy raspberries against his neck and tummy. He missed the soft look on Remus's face until he'd put the then- breathless Virgil back down on the picnic blanket and found his face cupped and turned for a tender kiss.

When they parted Remus leaned their foreheads together, brushing his thumb backwards and forwards over Patton's cheek. "I love you, you adorable, sexy, wonderful man."

"I love you too," Patton sighed.

"Babuh!" Virgil shouted, interrupting the moment and getting them both to look at him again. "Babuh."

"And we love you too, V-dog," Patton laughed. "We love you too."


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From this prompt:
> 
> I don't know if your still taking prompt but if you are how about kid virgil cuddle pile after having a bad day
> 
> Warnings: non-graphic illness (chickenpox)

"How is he?" Remus asked, locking the store behind him with his phone cradled between his ear and shoulder. He cursed softly when he fumbled the keys, but caught them and checked the door, ready at last to head home.

"He's okay, still pretty itchy and uncomfortable but it's easing off," Patton's voice came from the other end, a low murmur. "He's sort of sleeping, we put Pokemon on and it seemed to distract him from feeling bad, poor guy. You on your way home?"

"Yeah, I'll be there in ten. Thank fuck for short commute times, right?"

"Drive safe."

Remus pulled up to the house no more than ten minutes later, right on schedule. He hurried inside along with the groceries, dumping them in the kitchen before heading for the living room where Patton and Virgil were. "Hey," he murmured, giving Patton a quick kiss as he crouched by the couch, gently running his fingers over Virgil's warm head.

"Hey," Patton smiled, thumb rubbing soothingly over Virgil's back. They both silently watched their son sleep- fitful and frowning but sleeping nonetheless- for a few moments before Patton shifted. "He needs to have some water and a little food for dinner, let me go put the groceries away and get that and you two can have a cuddle, okay? I'll bet you've been worrying all day, haven't you?" He brushed his hand over Remus's hair then, as tenderly as he'd touched Virgil just before, and got up from the couch. 

Remus just nodded, attention focused on the kid laying on the couch cushions, looking tiny and sad and covered in little red spots. At least the doctor had seemed very unconcerned when they'd called up in a panic the night before, promising them that chickenpox wasn't out of the ordinary even if Virgil was quite young and giving them a few signs to watch out for. Patton's parents had been equally helpful; sharing their tips and calming both upset fathers down with their steady practicality and no-nonsense positivity. It was such a shame they were no longer right around the corner but with technology what it was the move had been more than worth it.

While Patton pottered around the kitchen, putting the groceries away and fetching what they needed for Virgil, Remus carefully scooped the boy up into his arms, hushing his miserable grumble with soft apologies and swaying gently on the spot until Virgil fell peacefully quiet again. They managed to get some food and water into him despite his reluctance, and then unanimously agreed to take the party to their bed, tucking Virgil between them both and putting something on Remus's laptop in the background while they cuddled, watching over their poorly son as he slowly recovered. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little skip forwards after the previous part, where Virgil is now roughly two years old!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: worms, referenced Covid-19 (quarantining only)

When twenty-twenty rears its ugly head the little family are both glad and not that they’d moved just in time. They’re far from the rest of Patton’s family, but they have a house and a garden and a big enough spare room to convert into a workspace while things are up in the air. 

The sunshine helps them both to see the positives, and Remus in particular is delighted by how much time he can spend with Virgil day to day. Just having him nearby always makes the adult smile, and he’s genuinely more productive with his regular short breaks to hang out with his tiny son. 

Patton on the other hand, isn’t doing so well. He’s always been the sort to struggle with world news, and Remus has had to turn the radio or tv off more than once when he finds his partner sat, brow pinched and chewing on his fingernails. In a last ditch effort to try and help Patton out Remus suggests they start trying to turn their little patch of grass into a proper garden. If nothing else it’ll be a good investment into the future, right?

So they order some supplies, message Virgil’s daycare parents group to get hold of any seedlings and cuttings they can, and set to work. 

It’s awesome. 

Even Virgil gets involved. 

“Baby no!” Patton squeaks, rushing over (again) to stop Virgil putting a handful of new earth into his mouth. He seems to have come to the conclusion that it’s probably chocolate, which is his absolute favourite thing, and Patton is considering finding a bin to put the stuff in so it can be locked away. 

Remus mostly just laughs. “He’ll be stronger for it, Pat!” He chuckles, covered in stains and mud himself, all the more so after hefting Virgil up onto his shoulders. Patton winces as the boy kicks his dirty rain boots against Remus’ chest but his partner doesn’t seem to mind, introducing Virgil to the new trellis attached to the garden fence for the sweet-pea to grow up. “It’s probably good for his immune system, you know?”

“Sure but not like, a whole handful at a time,” Patton sighs, the protest weak as he gets distracted as always by the wave of adoration he feels for these two boys. He smiles dreamily to himself as he turns back to the buddleja he’s been trying to plant. 

The afternoon is peaceful enough, serene with the lack of cars or planes to ruin the stillness. Every so often there’s the sound of someone else out in their own backyard, and distantly they can hear a saw going. Patton is unashamed to say that this sort of life is his idea of heaven; being a homebody with his perfect family, making a home and tending to it outside and in. He hums a soft tune to underscore the sounds of Remus putting their new furniture together by hand (and sometimes quietly swearing, or muttering how much he needed to invest in some proper powertools), until a little hand tugs on his shorts. 

Virgil is stood by his hip when he turns, and Patton gets just a moment’s warning from the kid’s shout of “Look!” before a grubby hand and a rather fat worm are shoved under his nose. 

He doesn’t yelp and fall back in surprise, because he’s been a parent now for almost two years and that response has been thoroughly drilled out of him. But his eyes do widen, and his nose flares as he fights the instinctive expression of disgust. Patton has nothing against worms! Honest! He just... thinks they’re pretty gross. But Virgil, like his father, has a healthy amount of respect for all things icky in nature, and he gasps as it wriggles around in his hand. 

Patton sees his fingers start to close reflexively and catches them gently. “No sweetheart, don’t close your hand. You don’t want it to get squished! Keep it flat, just like that, but put the other one here, see? So it can move around a bit more.” He helps Virgil cup his hands together as the worm starts to meander across the provided surface, looking for earth to burrow into. Virgil giggles when it probes between his fingers, looking up for guidance. 

“‘S’a worm!” He chirps, holding it up again though Patton has definitely seen it. “Um, daddy?” 

“Yes baby?” Patton’s heart skips a beat at the serious little frown on Virgil’s face as he thinks hard about something.

“What now?”

Right. The worm is definitely working on an escape plan and, though Virgil (and probably also Remus) might object; they can’t keep this poor thing as a pet forever. 

Patton shuffles round on his knees, putting his tools down properly to devote his attention to the situation at hand. “Hm, okay. We need to let it go home I think.”

“No!” Virgil gasps, but he remembers his instruction not to close his hands well enough to not clutch the worm to his chest like he clearly wants to do. “My worm, daddy!”

“Darling, we have to be nice to mr worm. He had a nice time with you but he has to go back home now, so he can go to his bed and have his dinner-” Patton is _lying through his teeth_ but that’s parenthood and it softens Virgil’s stubborn pout. “-So we can help him do that. Where did you find him?” 

Virgil leads him over to the corner where Remus had excavated a bunch of roots to put a little miniature pear tree. The soil looks fresh still, and Patton can see the signs of where two little eager sets of fingers scrabbled through the dirt like a tiny budding archaeologist. Virgil points the same spot out- careful not to drop the worm- and looks up at him again for help. 

“Okay, why don’t you put him down in the same place? He’s really good at digging, you can watch him for a bit if you want, but you’re not allowed to pick him up again, okay baby?” 

“Yes,” Virgil nods solemnly, doing his careful knees-to-butt fall that leaves him sat comfortably by the dirt. He puts his hands on the earth and looks at Patton when the worm doesn’t magically race off them to freedom. The adult stifles a fond laugh and demonstrates, cupping his hands and slowly pulling them apart, and Virgil squeals in delight when it works, leaving the earthworm wriggling on the ground. 

Patton can’t help it, he has to bend down to give Virgil a squeeze and kiss the top of his very earthy-scented hair (bath time will be fun tonight...) and then leaves him to his intent vigil as the worm slowly digs its way underground. 

Virgil tells the story for the next three days straight, getting up early in the mornings and jumping on the bed until one of them begrudgingly makes him breakfast and gets him dressed so he can go and sit outside and search for more worms, only to return them all gently to where he’d plucked them from after a quick tour around the garden, parroting the names of the plants in the tone, at least, that his fathers use, if not the exact correct words. 

It’s painfully adorable. 

And it is absolutely the reason why Remus turns to Patton in bed one night with that _look_ on his face that spells mischief, and says, “You know, I always wanted a dog...”


End file.
